It’s nearly time for fireworks and ticker-tape parades — Macalicious is turning 1 in a few weeks. His mother and all his grandmothers are beside themselves with birthday excitement. Lucky little bugger, being an only “grand” for several of us.
Today my daughter, MacMama, sent me a link for a “birthday shirt.” Which I had never considered buying a special shirt that is just for that golden moment, but I raised my kids before Etsy and Pinterest, so how was I to know?
The shirt has a large appliqued “1″ on the front, next to a sock monkey face. And that’s where this gets fun.
Before our boy was ever born, he had a built-in community. My daughter told us one and all that monkeys were off the table. No sleepers, no shirts, toys, nothing with a monkey was to come close to the Awaited One.
Do you have any idea how many baby boy outfits that took off the table? When Auntie Sue and I went shopping for the baby shower, monkeys practically grew out of the wall of every baby department.
Then, one day, it happened. MacMama discovered that packages of sleepers were darn reasonable at Costco. That option, however, offers no chance of selection. There it was, hiding behind the sleeper on the top — jammies with little grinning monkeys dancing on bananas, or something like that.
MacMama admitted defeat to Auntie Sue in a Facebook post. Game on, Auntie Sue responded. I believe she had the first sock monkey in a store cart in about 20 minutes.
When the MacFamily came to Walla Walla for a visit, Auntie Sue presented the young mister with his new toy.
That was that. From the minute — no, SECOND — on, Macadoodle was not without the soft primate between his gums. So much so that his parents have been forced to buy back ups so one can be sanitized in the wash, another lost in the car and the third in the mouth. So much so that Granny C, a musician by career, created “The Icky Stinky Monkey Song.” So much so that we call the tot “Monkey Mouth,” while delighting that he has fine-tuned just how far he can grin and keep Sock Monkey in place.
His mom and dad recently tried subbing in a fuzzy version of a Beanie Baby monkey. Silly parents. It never even made it through the teeth.
For Christmas, they acknowledged the inevitable and bought a sock monkey ornament for the tree.
I imagine there’s no hope for his birthday. We’ll be wading through a jungle of Sock Monkey paraphernalia. And when Malcolm looks back at the inevitable video, he’s ask MacMama why all the monkeys.
She’ll sigh and tell him, “Someday you’ll be a daddy and you’ll understand. Just don’t tell people ‘no monkeys’ or anything else.”